Liking an Unavailable Person: Tips on How to Deal…

Hey guys 🙂 The topic of today’s post is a little more light-hearted than usual. I’ll be telling you guys what I do when I find myself attracted to someone completely unavailable (which, believe it or not, happens A LOT for some reason, lol). Disclaimer: I won’t pretend I’m a relationship expert, but as a hormonal teenage girl, I have had my fair share of crushes. So without further ado, here are some ways I take my mind off of unavailable people:

1) Bury myself in schoolwork

I know, this sounds so nerdy, but for me, it really helps. By devoting your undivided attention to something other than this person, you start to forget this person until he/she appears less and less in your daytime reveries. Just doing calculus problems, taking outline notes from textbooks, or losing myself in an intriguing book can get me in that “flow” state of mind, in which I think of nothing else but the task at hand.

2) DANCE (or any other form of physical exercise, for that matter)

Dancing for me is another form of catharsis. Similar to burying myself in schoolwork, it allows me to take my mind off the person for a little while. Sometimes I do a little improv to depressing songs that reflect how I feel. All in all, physical exercise is a better mode of coping in the sense that exercising releases endorphin’s into your system, which makes you feel positive.

3) Pour out my feelings in my diary

In my opinion, writing is the best kind of therapy for any kind of crap life throws at you. Writing is SO incredibly cathartic. Your diary is an all-accepting, non-judgmental friend who is willing to listen patiently to your vents 24-7 without talking back. I love this quote from Hemingway: “There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.” When you feel shitty, sit down at your desk and bleed your heart out onto paper. This process is not necessarily fun, but when you finish, you will feel like a huge burden has been lifted from your shoulders. Guys. I’m telling you, writing is a beautiful thing that anybody can do. Writing saved me when I was in a dark place… I’m actually going to give a persuasive speech on Monday in public speaking class on why people should keep diaries.

4) List reasons why you SHOULDN’T spend precious energy pining over someone you will be with only in fantasies (i.e. I’m too busy right now, high school relationships don’t last, our schedules don’t work well together, etc.)

5) Listen to music about heartbreak 😉

Yes. Sometimes this works for me…

6) Break all ties with the person. That means deleting his/her number, disconnecting from said person on social media (facebook, instagram, snapchat, twitter), and pinching yourself every time you think/say said person’s name.

Yes, this sounds harsh. But I only take this measure when all else fails. If I am friends with this person on social media, I completely break all connections from him. I’m not suggesting that it is good to burn bridges in life, because it isn’t. But if a person is making you live in warm and fuzzy misery and is ACTUALLY impacting your life negatively, I say you have to do what has to be done.

In case you haven’t guessed already, what prompted me to do a post on this topic is the fact that I am currently in the processes of “weaning” myself from a certain guy who most likely doesn’t like me back. It’s tough, but I’m getting over it 🙂 I have bigger fish to fry, and so should you guys.

Love,

Belicia XOXOXOXO

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