Hi everyone! Long time no talk! How’ve you all been?
Life these past couple weeks have been… hard. Motivation is at an all-time low, and I’m not doing as great in my Chinese class as I’d hoped. Worried about keeping my 3.8 GPA up, I am currently waking up at 5:00am every day to study for a few hours before class. After class, it’s straight to the library for another study session. It’s the grind before finals, and I absolutely hate it. But I have no other option but to do well, so I must grind away.
Another reason why these past couple weeks have been difficult is because my moods have shifted to a low. I think stress is a trigger for my depression and anxiety, and I’ve been taking on a lot of commitments beyond schoolwork. I recently wrote an article on ballroom dance legend and UCLA alumnus, Victor Fung, and published it a few days ago. The article has gone viral in the ballroom dance community, garnering over 6,000 views thus far. My heart is so very full because of the article’s success, and I am so glad that Victor’s story was able to inspire so many people, particularly young dancers worldwide. However, I encountered a lot of stress trying to meet my hard deadline in submitting the article. Moreover, I’ve been preparing for my numerous post-grad jobs, getting all the paperwork filled out and attending new hire trainings. Finally, I am continuing to run my club, Bruin Burlesque, which, while fulfilling, is also a lot of work. Sometimes I need to remind myself to slow down and take time for myself. Yesterday was Memorial Day, and in addition to honoring veterans who have honorably served our nation, I took the holiday as an opportunity to recuperate. It was a great day– in the morning, my best friend and I went to the beach and chilled there for a couple hours. My only qualm was the fact that a giant piece of tar got stuck on my shin, and it took a long time and copious amounts of baby oil to remove the sticky substance. After the beach, I went to Sawtelle with some other friends to eat some good food for lunch. At 3:30pm, I had a 30-minute tutoring session– this time, I was the student! My friend Izzy is fluent in Chinese, and she has agreed to tutor me for the final exam. At 4:30pm, my friends and I watched the live-action version of Aladdin. I honestly loved the movie so much. Beautiful soundtrack (give the song “Speechless” a listen, I promise it won’t disappoint) and brilliant choreography. The movie is a must-watch for lovers of musicals and performance arts. Naomi Scott and Will Smith killed it as Jasmine and the Genie. The actor who played Aladdin was not bad, either!
What else has happened these couple weeks? Ah. Regents’ Scholar Society end of the year banquet! It was only these past two quarters that I’ve gotten more involved in RSS, first through SPIEL, and then through the Inter-UC Conference. At banquet, the RSS board members gave toasts to individual members. I received a toast from my friend Irena, and honestly, I was so moved. Irena was my coordinator for the Overnight Stay Program back when I was a senior in high school, so I’ve known her for quite a while now. Her words really resonated with me, and I am forever grateful to have met her. For superlatives, I earned the award for “Best Splits”. At the Inter-UC conference, which is a two-day event where Regents’ Scholars from all the UC’s gather for a day of fun activities, the group of UCLA students took their group picture, and I decided to show off in the front and do the middle splits! Hence, “Best Splits”.
This Thursday, I will be hosting my graduation party, cleverly named “Bye Belicia” (it’s a spin-off of the popular meme, “Bye Felicia”). The party will be a lot more low-key than my birthday party. It’ll take place on the rooftop of my apartment building. There will be food, drinks, and dancing! A last hoorah of sorts, before I graduate and transition to post-grad life.
Alrighty guys, it’s currently 6am. I’m sitting inside Peet’s Coffee, sipping on my iced mocha and munching on my sausage and egg sandwich– both of which I bought from Starbucks. Lol. I’m feeling a lot better today, and I’ve learned that the best way for me to stay stable is take it one day at a time, and try my best to stay positive. I mustn’t anticipate the next mental breakdown, because that will just fill me with anxiety and dread. My medications have been working to keep me stable, which is good.
I’m going to head to the gym right now. I’ll talk to you guys later!